Have you ever known that what you wanted to do was not God’s will, but you did it anyway? When this happens to me, my typical thought process is, “Oh, it will be okay. What I want feels and seems right. I’m sure that it will turn out well.” And then, of course, inevitably, getting what I wanted doesn’t turn out the way I thought it would. In fact, going with what I want over what God wants always turns out badly.
This has been the case recently for me. God seemed to want me to take a break from ministry. For me, I not only love serving, but I’m also very much a Martha type (see Luke 10: 38-42), which means that I love to keep busy. It is hard for me to stop doing things – even if it’s only for a short period of time. For me, working makes me feel validated; it makes me feel like I have a purpose. Now, there is nothing wrong with working, of course; working is good and it’s part of God’s plan for us. However, when work takes the place of God, as it often does for me, that’s not so good.
As it happened, I started getting burned out with doing so many activities. I don’t think that God was taking what I love away from me; God isn’t like that. Instead, God was gently trying to ask me to step back and rest in Him, but I wouldn’t listen. Instead, I ran myself ragged trying to get from one place to the other. I eventually had to stop doing so many activities just because I became so tired. The reality was, I had tried to do things my way, but God was right all along: I really couldn’t do everything that I wanted. I needed to come to God regularly and be filled with Him. Without going to God first, I could not receive, and therefore I had nothing that I could give to others. With nothing to give, I became physically, emotionally, and spiritually exhausted. And that wasn’t good for anyone!
So, all of this is to say that I’ve really loved writing for The Papist, but I need to take a break. I don’t know whether or not I will be able to come back and write again, but I’ll leave that up to God. I’ve been so grateful to be able to share my faith with all of you. Thanks for everything, and goodbye for now.Tags » faith, God, martha
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